REMINDER: I’M NOT FIXING ANY TYPOS BECAUSE I’M DRUNK AND IT WILL MAKE THIS RAMBLING MORE SILLY AND INSTRESTING
And spos woe go to claymation. They awesomeness thungus. The classic. The hour-long thingus that CBS plays at leasrt once every year. I figureds since I’m was so aquinted with Tim Burton’s little Claymation thingus, I may as well give to you something that I did truly like wheilst growing up.
So, for a little tid-bit… here’s Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
- So, a harsh winter is hitting most of the country? Must’ve been global waring.
- Also, why is Santa only coming to America?
- There is no such thing as a skiny Santa.
- RANDOM SIDENOTE: I totally need that sweater now.
- So, Rudolph is basically Penguin? Probably the other way around though, innit?
- Then, Rudolph goes in blackface.
- For that first year, you know. All that.
- Slave labored elves. Such micragresions.
- Mot fitting in. Morals. Things.
- Cause of a dentistry loving elf.
- Santa has elves sing to him when he’s bored? There’s probably a joke about woirship church services here. I know i.t.
- So.. Rudoplh having a red nose is a big deal. But having that huge thing on his snote isn’t? Such plotoles.
- The power of reindeer boners allows Rudoplh to fly with ease.
- THe singing is the worst bit inaything Chrstmas related.
- But at least Sout h Park’s Christmas critters show up during htis “always tomorrow” somng and such.
- Rudolph and the dentistry elf are voting third party in the election.
- Now, the moral of the story is, “don’t run away from home, ids.”
- Silver and gold. I guess someone thought that red and green became too tacky.
- Why does silver or gold give anyone pleasuere?
- Shouldn’t the snow monster just like… join everyone with the misfit toys?
- “This is man’s wordk.” Such patriarchy. And here I thought the 60’s was a progressive decade.
- RANDOM SIDENOTE: With all of this ironic “SJW” things I’ve been doing, I hope it doesn’t become a real thing. Nevermind.
- Something about toys. Misfits. Thingues.
- And there’s a knock off Thomas, train engine thingus there.
- Rudolph’s noce only shines when it’s convenient for the plot. DING!
- Neon nose? There’ssome random WASP joke here. If I could think of the lyric. But can’t be assed.
- So… the snow monster’s had his parents and that dough that liked him all this time?
- Eh. The pl;ot’s pretty much unbearable at this point. Anow an ice kill the snow monster.Well…. harm him at least.
- The Dentistry elf saves the day? I don’t even know
- Danb, Cirbekuys striahgt up dies. In a 1964 kid’s movie. Thing.
- But a massive snow storm is hitting the US and the North Pole. Because global cooling.
- Abd oif course, he isn’t dead. And the snow onster’s all awesome now. because Christmas.
- Santa abides by trhe FAA rules and such.
- Suddenly, I can’t stop sneezing. I blame this movie. About noses.
- “Holly Jolly Christmas” at least this movie got one song right.
- Santa grew fat in a couple of hourse. I call legit. No. Legit.
- Seriously though, the tears in this movie look awesome. I dunno what it is. But I like it.
- “up, up and away, ” wasn’t that a Superman thing?
- Rudoplh saves Christmas.
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