Like, Mike?

Merhaps, this is just gonna be a quick rambling. But ude. I’ve GOT to get this shit off of my chest. Forreals dude. Just cause. Likel For my ownn sanity or something you know?

But forreals. For the past month (the past… maybe 2 days aside), I couldn’t watch a Youtube video or turn on the TV, like a boomer, without seeing a Mike Bloomberg ad. Every five seconds. And like. Forreals. I swer to god. EVERY time I would watch A SINGULAR YOUTUBE VIDEO I’d have to be reminded something like. Mike Bloomberg’s parents were immigrants.


Or whatever the point of this ad was. I couldn’t tell you because it’s become static.

Next time I cme to youtube and checked out some Cultaholic wrestling newsness, Youtube/Google/Alphabet had to be DAMN sure that I knew that Mike Bloomberg went to College.


Or whatever the point of this ad was. I couldn’t tell you because it’s become static.

Damn, dude. I wanted to rewatch one of the best pieces of video media ever created, you know, Wrestling isn’t Wrestling, but daarn the luck, Mike Bloomber made sure to remind me something about taking bribes? I think?


Or whatever the point of this ad was. I couldn’t tell you because it’s become static.

But. Wouldn’t you know it. Google/Youtube/Alphabet’s brilliant AI decided to have an ad-break mid-sentence during my viewing of the greatest pieve of video media, Wrestling isn’t Wrestling, to remind me that Mike Bloomberg has money to spare.


Or whatever the point of this ad was. I couldn’t tell you because it’s become static.

RANDOM SIDENOTE: Dude. The slogan, “Mike will get it done,” is as bland as the dude in genral. I’m just saying.

#1. I’m not a registere Democrat. So. Uh. Why in the living hell would Youtube/Google/Alphabet ever even consider me as part of Mike Bloomberg’s target demographic? We’re in the Democratic Primary process… of whih, Mike isn’t even lke.. he hasn’t even been on the ballot and suh. So liike… why in the living CUNT  would I… me.. an OBVIOUS opponent against Bloomberg’s “lolz, anti soda” policies EVER consider voting for him… even if I could… in a primary? WHY AM I seeing these ads. Non stop?

#2. To be persuaded to vote for him in the genral? In the SO VERY LIKELY scenario where he… a billionaire… white… heterosexual… man… somehow manages to win a Democratic primary in 2020. Then goes on to be up against the unstoppable wave that’s gonna be Trump’s reelection. But. Seeing these ads. Now. They’re going to persued me to vote for Mike. Dude. All I wanted to do is rewatch some Honest Game Trailers. Why the fuck do I have to be reminded that “Mike will get it done.” Again. And again. And again.

#3. Dude. This is the thing. The fourth estate is dead. It’s killed itself. And like the rise of the internet and social media (FFS… rthis is my next rambling “social media”) has reassured this fact. The fourth estate tried its best to cling on to its powers. By being a boomer. The Mike Bloombergs of politics. The idea that, “The more ads you run, the better, right?” Dude. Meet 2020. You just interrupted some single-mom’s escape from reality.

She’s finally got the kids to bed. She’s fresh out of the bath. She’s climbed into bed and she’s got her phone beside her. She’s got the Youtube app open. Shes laying there, in bed. Scrolling through the random recomends, “WTF? Why would I ever care about the NHL finals?!” No matter. She keeps scrolling. Then.. she finds it. A 10 minute video… perfect for her to watch and fall asleep to… she puts it on… And she finds out something about paying for college sucks?


Or whatever the point of this ad was. I couldn’t tell you because it’s become static.

And. I mean. Hist candidacy hasn’t BEGUN. Offically. But uh.

I’m pretty positve. There’s NO “democratic process” in 2020. That is going to go for this kind of bullshit. Running ads. On top of ads. On top of ads. THERE IS NO PATHWAY TO VICTORY that includes ad-ing your way into the Presidency. That era is over.

Donald Trump Memed himself into the Presidency. There’s a difference. Trust me.

If Mike Bllomberg is President in 2021 I’ll eat my Dark Knight hat. Forreals. This is a legit bet. Holdd me to it. Please.

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