Whooo… Are YOU?

Because. In actuality. The Who has VERY LITTLE to do with this rambling.

And as far as that sort of “blame game,” goes. Who am I? Right? Obviously.

The whole idea of this here rambling stemmed from something that occurred in my personal life. Without going into details, I’ll just say this: multiple personality disorder was “used against” someone I know, in a very… VERY stupid way.

Meanwhile.

Obviously.

Hurricane Harvey happened this past week. And. More and more. Awesome stories started pouring out. From the Houston Texans’ J.J. Watt raising near $10,000,000 (at least, that was his last “attempted goal,” last I knew, I’m sure he’s reached that by now… if not… OMG~! HATE ME~! SLAY ME~! I was inaccurate~! Whatever.) To Glenn Beck’s audience raising an almost unsolicited $1,000,000.

To.

Pretty much.

One of the more amazing, “CLICK BAITY~!” stories ever. To come out of this tragedy that’s GOING TO AFFECT ALL OF US.

Man.

I was searching.

I was practically BEGGING for “proof” of this information. But. God damn it.

We’re WAY too far gone dude

Sigh.

Just.

Just. One of these in order to keep me sane at the moment.

Really man. I know it doesn’t seem like it. But I’m… legit… trying to make this “drunken rambling” as serious and realistic as humanly possible.

But.

Unfortunately.

This world. Is… FAR too unrealistic. And pretty much ridiculous as humanly possible. No matter what, there’s gotta be someone to blame~! There’s got to be someone with an agenda~! With EVERYTHING EVER.

EVEN WHEN IT COMES TO BASIC ECONOMICS SURROUNDING THE SITUATION… you know… IRL~!

SOMEONE IS POLITICALLY INCORRECT~!

Not in the “UH OH~! YOU SAID ‘RETARD’ INSTEAD OF ‘HANDICAPABLE~!'” type of sense. But in the. You know. REAL way the term “political correctness” was designed. You’re not being “correct.” Politically.

Man. I’m TRYING MY ABSOLUTE BEST. To find the “AMAZING” stories. That OBVIOUSLY do exist. But. The problem is. At the moment. For me, at least. I COULD be an oddity. I COULD be lazy. I don’t know. I’ve tried. Several times. To find the “good” stories that WE’VE ALL heard coming out of Houston. To give me some sort of “proof” that I’m right.

And.

Damn it.

The only thing I was able to find. Was the thing that “proved” (air quotes man) my point, kinda sorta. And maybe. Perhaps. It’s the only story that matters at the moment. I don’t know.

But.

The headline.

If I’m resorting to my high school journalism-ness.

Reads:

Black MMA Fighter Rescues Harvey Survivor Clinging to His Confederate Flag.

Dumb arguments. Because. We’ve got to have them now-a-days.

But like.

That headline alone, dude. ABSOLUTE FACT~! “news.” Or. “It’s tremendous how fake that news is. Believe me. Yuge.”

As far as I’ve been able to tell. That. Story. Alone. IS.

The. Story. Of.

America.

Period.

We are not the “Antifa” Communists. Nor are we the “Donald Trump isn’t ‘racist enough'” Neo Nazis that we saw in Charlottesville.

Joel Osteen isn’t the biggest asshole ever because he didn’t open up his megachurch because it was flooding. I mean. There could be arguments that he’s the biggest asshole ever. But it has NOTHING to do with this.

Melania Trump isn’t the biggest bitch ever because she wore high heels and a hat that read, “FLOTUS.”
RANDOM SIDNOTE: Although, it’s not random at all. But like. The fact that those two things I just talked about. Melania’s high heels and her hat. The fact that THAT was something to get SO OUTRAGEOUSLY OUTRAGED~! about. Just goes to show how far we’ve come. Sure. “‘Republicans raged about Obama’s Tan Suit on this date'” Or whatever. But really. That was like… one of the biggest non stories in the history of non stories. As are these regarding Melania. One thrown stone is equally as guilty as the other. In this dumb as hell situation. Period.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Sorry.

I’m delving WAY too deep into nonsense.

When, all I’m really trying to do is: Ask a simple question. Kinda. I mean. It’s THAT not simple. It’s as much of a deep cut as they come. But, in this, the grand scheme of absolute nothingness that is today’s news cycle:

It’s the most introspective piece that could POSSIBLY be conceived in this nonsensical pile of nothing that is today’s mainstream headlines.

“OH~! DONALD TRUMP CAUSED THE PROBLEM IN HOUSTON CAUSE HE CUT FUNDS TO FLOODING THINGS~!”

“OH~! DONALD TRUMP IS DOING MORE NOW FOR HURRICANE HARVEY VICTIMS THAN BARRACK OBAMA EVER DID FOR HURRICANE KATRINA VICTIMS THINGS~!”

I mean. Come on.

Man.

If we can’t be honestly introspective. Then, what’s the point? Right?


WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!

As Pete Townsend so eloquently asked during his lyrics that could have a stupid, “white privilege” spin on them. You know. Today.

Just.

Sigh. I’m pretty sure there was a point here.

Maybe you found it.

More than likely. You didn’t.

Because man. There’s no point to anything anymore. I mean. I’m sure I did a terrible job making this rambling all “serious” this time. But man.

From the Joel Osteen nonsense.

To…

You know…

This…

Je Suis Charlie. Forreals. But man. God damn it.

APPARENTLY… Anne Coulter said something VERY similar. Only it involved gay people… somehow? I don’t know. I don’t care.

WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!

No dude.

If you’ve read this far. Answer that question. The question Pete Townsend so eloquently posed.

WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!

Me? I’m a pathetic asshole that lives in his parents basement. I couldn’t be assed when my community was burning. Nor could I be assed when my community was flooding post said burning. I’m a pathetic, cowardly, asshole that writes shit when I’m drunk. That’s basically it.

That’s who I am.

NOW TELL ME WHO ARE YOU?!

Something like that? I mean. Maybe? I don’t know.

Man.

Thanks for rating this! Now tell the world how you feel - .
How does this post make you feel?
  • Excited
  • Fascinated
  • Amused
  • Bored
  • Sad
  • Angry

Ryan

I’m pretty awesome. I write drunken ramblings. Lover of gaming. Engaged in an on-again-off-again relationship with pro-wrestling. And I am your resident Batman expert.

Leave a Reply