The Cyberpunk 2077 Debacle

Well man… outside of a couple of tweets that I wrote, some livestreams that I did that nobody watched, and an upcoming podcast that’s gonna come out in the next xoming days, I’ve been pretty damn quiet on the subject of Cyberpunk 2077. I mean, sure, I’ve been pretty damn quiet in general over here. I’ve been having too damn much fun with my steadily growing livestreams to pay attention to my Youtube channel’s namesake (you know, this here blog/rambing/whatever thing that this here website is) . But yeah… I just wrote *MY* Cyberpunk 2077 Spoilers, and I shut the fuck up about it all.

Lmao, #Cyberbug2077 crashed on me during the end credits. Doesn’t get much more meme-ier than that, right?

— RyansDrunk.com (@Ryans_Drunk) December 18, 2020

So, I mean. Time to say… some things. Right?

First and foremost, I played the game o n a base PS4. Which… apparently, is the worst way to play it, from what I understand. Not that it’s much better on a base XBONE but. Still. PS4 is worst, I guess. So uh… YAY?!

BUT… Legit? I think I ran into this sorta thing…

Three times at the most. Those that shat all over the game made it out like, this happens ALL the time. It doesn’t. BUT… the fact that it does happen. In this, ‘NEXT-GEN OPEN WORLD RPG EXPERIENCE~!” whatever, ONCE is far too many times.

BUT… legit… there’s been THREE games that have ever made me stop, drink in the scenery and just sit in aqw of how beautiful the graphics are.

One game was Red Dead Redemption II.

Another was Mass Effect: Andromeda

The other was Cyberpunk 2077.

The first sign I had that something was going wrong with the game? Well…

Here’s… you know… a clip of me playing that first mission… you know… the one from the, apparently, gaked E3 demo… where you save Sandra Dorsett…

Now, that dude kept shout shit over and over and OVER again. Even though he was dead. Then I did that there.

Shortly afterwards? I experienced my first crash. You know. You do that mission. Wake up in your apartment and uyou’re supposed to meet Jackie. I met Jackie, sat down and crashed. And. I mean. Obviously. That would be the first of MANY. I mean. Sure. I KINDA learned that you could avoid crashes… sometimes… by driving slowly. But honestly? The last two times I tried playing the game? I just crashed out of no wheres. And thsoe were two back-to-bak crashes.

But I mean.

I thought this was Cyberpunk 2077, not The Witcher III?!

Most GLITCHES (not that all of these clips are glitches… but)_ that I experienced weren’t, at all, game breaking. The only game breaking shit I experienced were the crashes. And. Again. They happened a LOT. Obviously. Out of my one and a third playthroughs? I’ve no idea how many times I crashed. That shit? That shit’s game breaking.

Althyough… not a glitch… not a… anything… but… just… SHUT THE FUCK UP, DELAMAIN!

Delaman being annoying as a motherfucker was damn near game breaking. Legit. Watch the streams I did. You’ll see. Or don’t watch them. You’ll probably be better off. Legit? Delamain callubg ne every 5 secibds because I came within 5 miles of a car of his is annoying as fuck. I was DEFINITELY screaming, “SHUT THE FUCK UP, DELAMAIN!” during my streams. No doubt.But yeah. Whatever. Delamain and crashes are neck-and-neck with worst aspects of the game. Legit.

But I mean. Again man… I’ve got a HIGH tolerance for glitches. T-poses barely bother me. I mean, shit’s immersion breaking, sure. But graphics and stuffs don’t affect me, really. Especially when you’d see those early-ish promotional videos and people were bitching about like, “OMFG~! SOME NPC’S HAIR DIDN’T SHOW UP ON THEIR HEAD RIGHT AWAY! I’MA KILL MYSELF NOW~!” or however that outrage worked. I shrugged that shit off.

Kinda like the way the nomads shrug off their cars, I guess.

So… just before release. I watched YongYea’s initial review.

Before I go there, lemme say this. It’s because of YongYea that I first heard of Cyberpunk 2077. I mean, it must’ve been around a month after I played The Witcher III for the first time, somewheres in early 2016. From there I check out the announcement trailer. And like… once a month (maybe more than that) or so, I’d check in on YongYea to find out the latest Cyberpunk news. So. Yeah dude. As far as Cyberpunk goes, he was kinda my go-to. And… low and behold. He was like, “Nah bruh, I can’t show my own footage.” Obviously, not a direct quote. But.

And I was taken aback, and I’m like, “That’s fucking strange, doesn’t sound very, ‘PLAYER FIRST~!’ (wink, wink, nudge, nudge) of CDPR.” But I mean, I still didn’t have too big of a concern. Afterall, Yong’s complaints sounded a LOT like the aforementioned “GAMEBREAKING~! NPC HAIR NOT LOADING~!” Plus. I mean.. CDPR themselves released a video showcasing the diference between PS5/PS4 Pro and XSX/XBONE (whatever their “pro” equivelant was called… more on that in the meme below)… and I mean… it looked fine. Surely the base PS4 couldn’t be THAT different, could it?

Well… yeah dude. It. Uh… It was terrible. Obviously.

And after a couple days worth of playing, dealing with the crashes, etc. Putting 2 and 2 together. Finding out that it equals 4. And…. uh…

This is my impression of how much faith I have in CDPR and with that, the ENTIRE video game industry… minus the whole “survival aspect.”

and I mean… I dunno. That’s uh… kinda my impression of life too these days. Outside of doing my streams and recording the podcasts, of course. I dunno man.

I just don’t. So. I guess this rambling’s done? For now? Merhaps?

I’ll just inform you know that…. uh…

Being Panam Palmer is NO WHERE NEAR as instresting as Being John Malkovich