I mean. Man.
I’ve liked all of these movies. Man of Steel, Batman V. Superman, Suicide Squad, Justice League (I haven’t seen Wonder Woman, but I’m sure I’d like it too). The problem is? I haven’t LOVED any of them. I’ve LOVED aspects of them all, ESPECIALLY Justice League. I ABSOLUTELY LOVED aspects of Man of Steel. But there’s not one of these movies that I love.
And. God dman it.
Allow me to do this. As quickly as I can.
I’ve been planning to make this some sort of “YouTube” videio thingus. But I’ve all but COMPLETELY given up on that YouTube channel of mine. And. I mean. YouTube’s censorship nonsense isn’t making it any easier to make me want to make any more videos.
I’ve never openly said this. But it’s the absolute truth. When I saw the “MARTHA~!” scene in Batman V. Superman, I totally cringed. I damn near said aloud in the theater, “COME ON, REALLY?!” I said it in my head, definitely.
After further viewings, nothing’s REAKKY changed.
I’ve understood more and more with each viewing what they tried to accomplish.
Batman. Batfleck. Is old as fuck. He’s meeting up with another hero, powerful boyond ALL belief. He’s dealth with Joker. Hell… he’s beatn Joker up so much he’s gotta put a grill in to have teeth. Or.You know. Hoker’s gotta make teeth out of metalness.
Fir the first time ever, Batman has met someone equal AND greater than him. He’s beat up cunts that used “wind up penguins” already. He’s been through it all. Right?
Superman, at Batman’s mercy cries, “Save Martha!” The one thing Batman could never do. Batman couldn’t save his mother, Martha. Batman, being human. Loses. It. “WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME?!”
In essence. After all of his 30ish years of being Batman. Bruce Wayne. IS STILL. Motivated… COMPLETELY… by the death of his parents. THat’s what the “MARTHA~!” scene from Batman V. Superman is showcasing. The execution is poor. Yes. It’s probably written badly. Maybe the poor execution is on XZack Snyder’s direction. Maybe Batfleck phoned it in for this scene,. Maybe it’s on the editor. I don’t know. The point is. It’s done poortly. But what it’s trying to accomplish is awesome as hell.
Sigh. That rant took longer than I wanted it to.
The future of DCEU?
I mean. Ouytside of the already ing the can Aquaman movie, and a CERTAIN Wonder Woman sequal, there’s so much up in the air.
Ecen after everything announced.
Also on the “announced” docket were “Gotham City Sirens” directed by Suicide Squad‘s director with Margot Robbie as Haryley and a rumored Megan Fox as Poison Ivy. Matt Reeve’s “The Batman” which is… some sort of prequel to Batfleck? Some sort of elseworlds’ Joker story starring Leonrdo DiCaprio. Plans are going forth with a Man of Steel sequel, apparently. “The Flah” has become Flashpoint. There’s no longer Justice League Part Two.
And… I know I’m forgetting something.
I mean… look.
But again. All that’s REALLY confirmed is Aquaman and a Wonder Woman swquel.
And there’s been tons of memes going ’round about how Marvel’s got like fice movies coming out this year. And DC’s only got Aquaman.
How much do you wanna bet? The headline will be: “Aquaman – THIS IS WHY WE HATE SUPERHERO MOVIES! IT’S YOUR FAULT, DC!”
Alright.So. Specially. The future. Right?
Shoot a new post-credits scene for Auquaman.
CUT TO… a sushi chef. He’s you know… doing whatever sushi chefs d. Have the camera flow through the kitchen. Into the bar of this, apparent Suishi Bar, place. Aquaman himself is seen slamming down whiskeys and such. After everything that happens in the movie, he’s slamming down whiskeys. Obviously.
An unknown, familiar, mouth-filled voice says, “And so, I keep going back to it, you know? I wonder if I could actually do such a thing.”
Rotate the camera now to Aquaman’s side, hidden beside him was Ezra Miller. You know. The Flash. He’s got plates full of sushi in front of him. You know. Cause. Calories and all that. Aquaman’s pretty much ignoring him.
Flash swallows his food and says, “What would you do if you were me?”
Auquaman jumps off his barstool and grabs Flash by the throat and says, “You don’t know the fire you’re playing with. Didn’t you learne your lesson after the motherbox?” He throws Flash to the floor.
And he says, “Go home kid.”
Flash whipes his lips off with his sleeve.
END CREDITS OF WONDER WOMAN II~!
I’ve got no idea the setting or scene. But basically…
Flash is with Wonder Woman. he says, “I just… I know I could save her if I tried.”
Wonder Woman plays a bigger role in this. But I don’t know what she does.
All I know is… If Batfleck really does want one last hurrah~@! Or whatever… He enters the scene and he says, “Barry, you have no idea what you’re dealing with. You don’t know the ramifications of it. I’ve studdid String Theory. You’re playing with things you don’t understand.”
I gess, Wonder Woman could say that. But it’d mean more coming from Batfleck.
Ezra Miller flips out. He says, “I’m sick of you guys trying to control me. I’ve needed this all of my life. I’ve needed this prooven all of my life! You’ll see! I’ll prove you all wrong!~”
Matt Reeve’s “The Batman” thing happens. Merhaps Deathstroke is involved. Who knows. But basically….
THE BATMAN END CREDITS~!
“That’s how it happened,” Batfleck tells Ezra Miller in the Batcane, “that was my first time being The Batman. If you do what you’re going to attempt, just remember, you could undo all of this. Your butterfly’s wing could allow Deathstroke to cut through my cables and escape.” (I’M JUST SPIT-FIING HERE).
Determined. Ezra Miller, dawning the Flash gettup in the Batvane says, “I know what I’m doing.”
BUT… You do it slightly differently.
Flash, who doesn’t know, FOR SURE, that he can go through time, is trying to prove his father didn’t kill his mother. He’s not tryig to save her. But through the process he meets reverse Flash they duke it out and in the end, he saves his mother by acciden.
Wakes up in the Flashpoint world.
Do you COMPLETELY reboot the universe after that? I’m not sure. I’m laying the groundwork for you. Like I did when I preached making a “World’s Fniest” movie. Don’t fuck it up this time, Warner Bros.